"You Know...?" Julianna Rowe
I was listening to a podcast the other day, and the guest seemed bright, interesting, and had a lot to say. There was just one tiny problem. Every sentence in the beginning, the middle and ended with, "You know?" At first I barely noticed it, then I noticed it. Then I couldn't un-notice it. Before long, I found myself mentally keeping score. Three... seven... twelve... By then I wasn't even listening to what she was saying anymore. I was just waiting for the next "you know." I finally shut the podcast off.
Then came the embarrassing part.
I DO IT TOO! Not when I write. Thankfully, my fingers seem to know better than my mouth. But when I'm talking, "you know" slips into conversations like an uninvited guest who keeps helping themselves to the potato salad. Apparently, there's a reason for it. Our brains are racing ahead looking for the next thought while our mouths are still finishing the last one. Instead of allowing a tiny pause, we fill the silence with little verbal crutches like "you know," "like," "I mean," "well," or "so." They're really just placeholders while our brains catch up.
The funny thing is, silence makes the speaker uncomfortable, not the listener. Most people don't mind a brief pause while someone gathers their thoughts. In fact, it often makes them sound more confident, but our brains panic and toss in a "you know" to keep the conversation moving.
So I've decided to run my own little experiment. For one week, every time I feel a "you know" coming, I'm going to replace it with... absolutely nothing. Just a pause. It will probably feel like an eternity to me, but chances are no one else will even notice.
Now here's the funny part. Ever since I started writing this, I've been catching myself saying "you know" all day long. It's like buying a red car and suddenly seeing red cars everywhere. I guess awareness is the first step toward breaking a habit. So, if you hear me pause for a second while we're talking, don't worry. I'm not having a semi-senior moment. I'm simply giving my brain time to catch up with my mouth.
"You know..." or maybe you don't anymore.
— The Happy News Lady
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