What Men Say When They Don't - "YOU'RE BEING TOO SENSITIVE" by Julianna Rowe

 

What Men Say When They Don't...... ACT V- Why Are You Being So Sensitive

A series on language, clarity, and the quiet announcements people make before theydisappear.  Hosted on The Happy News Lady  While these pieces focus on  men, the language of avoidance isn’t gendered. 

ACT V – Gaslighting

“You’re Being Too Sensitive.”

This phrase often appears the moment someone realizes their words have landed badly. Perhaps you point out the tone or you explain how the comment felt dismissive, unkind, or unnecessarily sharp. You’re not yelling nor are you attacking.You’re simply acknowledging what happened. And that’s when the response arrives.

“You’re being too sensitive.”   

It’s a fascinating little maneuver because instead of examining the words that were spoken, the spotlight shifts immediately to your reaction.Your feelings become the problem, not the comment, not the tone, and not the timing.

Just your response.

Suddenly the discussion is no longer about what was said. It’s about whether you are emotionally reasonable enough to deserve an explanation. And once that shift happens, the conversation changes entirely. If you push back, you risk being labeled dramatic. If you try to explain yourself further, you may be told you’re overreacting. And if you decide to simply let it go, the original behavior remains conveniently untouched. That’s why this phrase works so well. It quietly removes responsibility from the speaker and places it squarely on the listener’s emotional shoulders.

But here’s the thing. Sensitivity isn’t the flaw people often pretend it is. Sensitivity is how humans recognize tone, intention, and emotional nuance. It’s how we notice when something doesn’t feel quite right. So when someone repeatedly insists that you are too sensitive, it may be worth pausing for a moment and considering another possibility. Perhaps the issue isn’t that you’re overly sensitive. Perhaps the issue is that someone would rather question your reaction…than reflect on their own behavior.

“Well now, didn’t that escalate more than necessary?” 

The Happy News Lady signing off until tomorrow.