We Don't Know So Much About Life....Do We? .....by Diane Ogden

The Human Race, on the whole, from my view, the past several decades, has shown "it" really doesn't believe we are all connected at all! I do.... I really do.

The Love of My Life...Really Wasn't...............by Diane Ogden

 

All those self help books are in the trash! Either my mind has metal plates surrounding it or I was birthed a stupido! I carried a deep beyond words love for one man from the age of 27 until last month. I carried that love through two other marriages. Not that I didn't love my "hubbs" plural! I have heard we all have the "first love" or "soul mate" love in our lives. Personally I have come to learn we can love more than one person but in different ways. I could go into a long love story here that lasted "three years to life" (some call that a sentence)......ad to it all the ups and believe me the downs....add the children hurt.....the flights back and forth from Oklahoma to Wisconsin every week.....the heart pounding races to the airport with what seemed like movie star red carpet meetings at the entrance gates bounding into the warm passionate arms of one another then building further to gentle yet firm kisses for all to view. Never knowing anyone else was in the building. Carrying luggage, sharing meals, drinks, loving tenderly....dancing closely, laughing uncontrollably, and best of all looking into one an others eye's seeing the reflection of only one of two. We shared a Deep love indeed. I have heard that money is the root of all evil. Pain could be included in that circle of adjectives regarding pain. Grief too. The world says true and honest Love is all good and pure. So there you have my story, all "tied up," there I go with those wonderful puns again...I love my puns! Basically my story is tied up in two sentences or even two words. Love or Money. He chose the money and I was left with the grief and pain. I thought I should die. Long story again.... humm maybe some day I shall have more time for believe me this would be a great book. The tall dark and oh so handsome cowboy, and I shall add, rich cowboy too. He purchased for me a brand new 19 (never mind it would show my age totally) something burgundy and white Grand Prix. Asked me to marry him...... I hear it was something about his "Daddy" that stopped the gentle deep love, the travel, the red carpet meetings, the marriage, the everything, in our tracks. In a motel outisde a dusty small town in western Oklahoma, where he was instructed and sent to give me the family decision, we sat on the edge of the bed and sobbed together like two children. Daddy chose new tracks for my fiance, and I felt like a homeless bum left in a box car on those lonely tracks, alone to die. A lost Love can make a person feel like that. Yet as the years past he was always that little box of a dream I could go to when I needed. He was a photo in the second drawer of my jewel box and a chapter in my life book page 266. He was not my God but he was one of my earthly treasures I always hoped to meet again whether at age 80 on earth or in love in the heavens hereafter. Over the years we spoke by phone a few times, even met once. Oddly the man I did marry lived in a small town in Texas where my love built and opened a business one mile away from our home. Oddly?? I would say. He had moved from his lifelong home in Oklahoma to this city in Texas. One mile from me. I moved from Wisconsin to one mile from him. And by then he had more children and so had we. The next time we spoke he had 14 Grandchildren and I had 6..... I knew then heaven was about the only place we might ever be together at again. Yes I am laughing. On occasion during a boring evening at home I would Google his name. Yes I did! And finally one night I found pictures of he and his family...all six children, the Grands, his still living Mother.....and Jackpot, I found one of his daughters on a Face Book site. He is bald and I barely recognized him. Looking at his photo I could still feel the warmth and safety of his arms and the softness of his lips on mine. Whoa, hold it..STOP SIGN! They love GEORGE BUSH! My heart dropped at my computer desk...my dreams smashed, my hopes lost, my years of deep wanting and memories crushed like a mile wide tornado came onto my screen and into the furrows of my mind and left me empty. Crap, now that's twice I am left empty by this fellow. My fault...I could have kept my delusional dreams and fake security forever if I hadn't hit that keyboard or joined face book. Now I don't even have a fake memory of a deep love and all that shit! Why I wouldn't even want to be with him in heaven because he might be standing next to George Bush! He donates allot of $ to George Bush! See the money won out again in the end.... the money even took my fragile dreams. I say I deserve it all back a hundred fold but with real love this time! So the moral of this love story is that it really wasn't. Be careful what you pray for because they say you might just get it! Bye R.C. it was a "hell" of a ride. God I love my puns. (By the way, his wife is Really Really LARGE!) Too bad so sad....

Friends?......................by Diane Ogden

.I had a best friend in grade school that I have kept track of over the years.  We reconnected in the 70's in Houston for a brief time, both in the midst of life's trials. I still check her on Google.  She is an accomplished jeweler in Sante Fe who has an interesting book on Blurb called, "All Things Have A Voice."

 

I had another best friend I met in the 70's who always inspired me how to keep going.  We traveled life through two husbands each.  That was special......not!  She gave me everything from bra's to cars. Bought my children shoes, gave them birthday parties, stood up for me in bad times when no one else was there.  She and her third husband moved to Florida but we remain in contact to a much lessor degree considering that story was twenty years ago. I hope I gave something back to her.

 

Another friend I met in Oklahoma in the late 70's during a tumultuous court custody trial and pregnancy.  She helped me through the last thirty five years of my life and still does to this day.

She recently lost her husband of fifty some years.  Yet she continues to help and uplift others including me.  You can find her at http://dearonelovegod.blogspot.com

I hope I give something back to her.

 

Then there was the religious friend.  Yes religious, not spiritual.  She was kind and sweet and could see things in the spirit better than most psychics yet thought they were of the devil.  Interesting how some people's teachings are so limited.  And yes her husband believed he ruled like the kings in the Old Testament.  Eeww.  They also taught me, who must have needed to latch onto a group to feel worthy, or fit in maybe or??. The ?? meaning not having the wits of self to make decisions.  So I listened and drank it all in and when I sold my home of many years I paid off all debt because dontchaknow religious people say "you" and I should not owe any money to anyone.They told me GOD SAID. I also closed credit accounts and started a new business in a new town.  Oops.  It died along with all my credit and cash reserve.  Thus there went it all.  I started over by delivering newspapers until I could strengthen up and start another business.  It took me almost ten years to regain my credit, save a few dollars and talk to Charles (God) vs any religious friends who have since gone by the wayside.  Not that I don't respect their lives as each of us in on our own journey.  I should have stayed on mine and not latched onto theirs.  MyBad! I do hope I gave something good back to those that truly tried to offer me the only thing they knew.

 

There was that high school bestie that never forgave me for one single act of unkindness I bestowed on her one day out of our lifetimes.  My boyfriend told me I couldn't hang around with her for some reason...I know now it was jealousy/control, but then I must have latched on once again to someone vs using my own wits. 

 

I have a sisterinlaw at present. I always wanted her to be the sister I never had.  She never stepped into that position.  I tried for years to be her friend.  I would call them often, but she would only call a couple times a year and then bait me for family information. I finally caught onto that one.  I don't care to even have the twice a year verbiage anymore.  She has always said I brought her to the Lord.  So I guess that is all good whether we talk anymore or not.

 

Then there is my x sister law. She remains a friend today.  From the 70's to present.  We have watched each other grow older. Although she got a facelift.  And she got a decent husband also.  Guess that means I am two behind in all areas.  (Oops three behind in one area.) Oh and she built herself a new home.  I am in an apartment. (I don't have upkeep ha)  She is sort of religious and sort of spiritual ( there must be a name for that) so we can converse unless she has a few beers thus the religion demon steps up to the plate and talks for hours about the old testament! I still love her in spite of. We stay on fairly equal ground in terms of giving. And I hope she doesn't read this.

 

There have been a few stand in friends over the years.  But no real keepers.  Most have families or too many problems just busy or .....I don't know.  I don't knit, or quilt, or play cards much.  I don't  have time for book clubs much less to sit and read one.  I mostly get audio or playaways.  

I have not had a vacation since 1987.  I did take one week off once.  And was sick for eleven days once.  Other than that I have worked, raised five children, three of them totally on my own.  Who cares?  Really no one.  Just typing away this morning for some reason. Maybe its the new Pope. I am not catholic but I found it refreshing.  Maybe its Bob.  Bob Ogden, the cat that is blessed from previous blogpost.  Maybe I am just a little tired.

 

Reminiscing isn't always a good thing.  And sometimes it is.  Actually I believe its the fact so very many people close to me are taking spring break vacations. Clients, friends, family.

 

I have four sons.  One of them told me he always makes sure he has enough money for work and play.  That was my mistake if I am wondering at all the whys of life.  (Seems I am today) And hopefully after I stop and Wal Mart and the grocery store later today I will be back with some funnies. Thank God for my funny side!  I promise it will be back, in fact its just hiding under a couple grey clouds this morning.  It will break through. It always does because it is my best friend and has been and always will be.  I take care of it and it takes care of me.  Just like my Buick. 

 

So be well, be happy, be safe, and get rich so you can take vacations or at least time off to finish the novels.....   or both.  

 

Bob lives on.................by Diane Ogden

BOB!  Bob Ogden woke up with an abscess below his eye from the "funny farm fight."  You know that place, farm, I was raised on where someone dropped this sweet precious feline off to fend for himself.  I suspect they knew he needed some medical attention and said, "No way Hose." I should probably call Bob Hose and see if he responds.  Back to my point. I dropped Bob of at Banfield Clinic for the third time, where Dr. so and so (She gave me some financial slack so I don't want to say her name publicly) took excellent care of him all day. She told me all the staff is pulling for Bob.  He is the only cat in the history of her years as a Veterinarian who didn't need to be sedated to have a needle aspiration below the eye.  Everyone loves Bob!  BUT..... I asked Dr. so and so if Bob could die?  She shrugged and said..."If we could do all we need to do to find out it would cost $900.00.  That being said, we will take it day to day with Bob and hope for the best."  And so I agree.
She also added a very strong antibiotic called doxicillian, $100 for the liquid, $46.00 at Target, and $10 at Banfield,  to the clavamox plus eye ointment.  Oh and she mentioned the big dogs. You know the eye specialist I could take him to but they cost huge astronomical gargantuous bucks. 
America needs to get a grip!!  But I don't see that happening until America hits bottom.  I only hope I am dead and gone before Korea bombs my and Bob's ass.  (sorry but it just fits right in there ya know?) Ass I mean. 

Okay so I am sitting in the waiting room waiting for Bob.  There is wooden bench to sit and wait on.  They bring Bob out and set him next to me.  I feel so dang bad for Bob!  He looks like chit.  His eye is still swollen even after the extraction of much puss and blood, they told me.  He has rec'd fluids, and an enema type medicine considering his belly was full of poo.  And they also sent home worm meds.  Jeez !! 
Poor Bob!!  I felt so bad for him I scooted backwards on the wooden bench to be able to bend down and speak soft words of comfort to him when I ungracefully fell backwards off the stupid bench. (Ha likes its the benches fault duh) I hit the hard metal edge of the dog scale with my elbow and my ars ass hit the edge of it and slid onto the floor and oh yes I had an audience!  Like several people waiting to pic up their animals plus the staff at the desk and the ones wandering about.  One said, "Are you okay?"   I said, "I think so, physically but not sure humiliatingly."  They laughed, and I could have cried a dang river from what my week with Bob and what the Care Credit Card might do to me.(CARE Creidt ya right Care)  If I don't pay it off in 6 months the interest is to the moon Alice.  30%!!!  Is that out of the ball park robbery and I have good credit.  So.....I am getting my cardboard sign ready ....to head out for the Macy's intersection to see if folks wont donate to my loving cause.  BOB! You know like the guy that stands by the WalMart intersection making everyone so darn nervous cause you want to give him a $20 but your not sure if he is for real.. And then the guy that brings his dog and makes the dog sit there in the snow all day while he stands with his cardboard sign and Styrofoam cup!! Maybe I should write to Ellen!  I don't need $25,000, I need $500!  That should be doable huh?    And one last and most important thing.  I prayed big for Bob.  I told Charles, (God who I call Charles) "Ya know Charles, I believe....so if I believe and I use your name cause I have no power without your sons name  Jesus.....well then Bob will be fine."  So be it!!  Bob will be fine. No more need for credit  or to write Ellen, or for my blood pressure to hit the moon over a dumped off cat.  No, I just the need to pay it off and enjoy Bob for the rest of his life or find him a wonderful home.  Either way hooray for Charles!  And or all the gracious givers at the intersection of Macy's and Midvale Boulevard that Charles sent!  Reminds me of the woman that prayed to win the lottery and she got overtime instead!! 
So until my next adventure  ........... be safe, be well, be happy, and get rich so you can fix a blessed stray cat that comes to you for help without your B.P. going to the moon. And some corporate credit card charging you 30% interest even tho you have good credit.   Laters

My Grannie is a Hiney!.................by Diane Ogden

“Just making it easier for you to get a little Hiney.” (Wine of course) I don't think Grannie ever said that to me. Nor did I ever say that to anyone else.  In the blog post about Myrtle Manor, the Red Neck reality trailer park show, there are two girls that sell wieners on the beach..... I am a real hiney ha!

When I first saw the advertisement for Myrtle Beach I thought it would be funny and I could be on that funny show. Then I watched it and realized it wasn't funny, it was eww eww.  Then I heard the Hiney wine bits online and saw the girls selling weiners on the beach (from Myrtle Manor)to make a living and then remembered I have Hiney.  Hiney from my Great Grandma and Grandma.  I have real Hiney, I don't need to sell wieners on any beach.

 Great Grandmother Hiney was a dear lady.  And a rich lady.  Farmers in Wisconsin they were.  Joseph Hiney was my Great Grandad.  He is probably rolling over in his heavenly grave due to my verbiage here.  But I cant pass up a good joke.
 
"I only buy hiney in a wooden cask. That way I can tell my husband to grab his hammer and meet me in the cellar when I’m ready to tap that hiney."  (Wine of course) 

Hiney Wine is the brainchild of Terry Dorsey, who developed the bit while on the air in the Mid-1970's at WONE-AM in Dayton. Terry come in every day with a spiral bound notebook in which he had the original "Hiney Wine" spots written out in longhand. When he moved to WING, Hiney Wine (and the notebooks) went with him.  
I wonder if I am related to the Hiney Winery people.   That would be cool huh?  

This is just a lil tidbit of where I came from and what I became...  I am much more than just a Hiney!

So until I discover something funny or new or interesting, be safe, be well, be happy, and get rich so you can do your genealogy to see if your related to any Hiney's, or Wieners of the world.  And:

 

 

"Grab a Hiney"  (wine that is)

Burned Dinner................by Diane Ogden

 Yup this was to be my dinner yesterday.  I wasn't very hungry so I opted for a half a grilled cheese sandwich.  I bought this cute little cast iron pan for such dinners.  It is also good for one egg, one salmon Patty, or one burger.  So this was it's turn to make mama happy and make one half.  I turned the burner onto about 6 or 7, put the buttered bread and cheese on the baby cast iron pan and walked away.....
to put Bob in the carrier to go to the vet.  I should know by now I  cannot walk away from anything or I forget what I am doing.  And yes I am going to blame stress.  Yes Yes Yes. 
I put my coat on, grabbed my keys and Bob in his carrier, opened the door and left for the Veterinarian, with the burner on med high!!

Bob and I left around 4 and got back 45 minutes to an hour later.  When I carried Bob up the steps from the underground parking I smelled a burn smell.  FIRE smell ya know? Hello.  I wasn't too worried because it just never happens here.  I did think, what wiener was burning his dinner? Although my dang smoke alarm goes off when there isn't even a slither of grey smoke in site.  That said, I opened the apartment door and light grey smoke is all about the place. I mean all about the place!! My brain went into OMG there is a fire in here how will I get all my little critters out.  That would be my cat Lucy, my lil dog Gracie...My daughters cat LuLu, and the new BOB who I just sat down in the bedroom as my brain thought all these things in a nanosecond.  Sort of like now I know how life flashing before your eyes happens. When you die you are so friggin scared your dead brain and heart are still following  you like the chicken with his head cut off running around the funny farm...  Seriously!  I ran to each room looking for the fire.  No fire.  I hit the kitchen running and there it was.  What you see in the photos and no flames or big smoke rather light grey all over the place.  I tell you the truth.  This was a flippen miracle.  It has to be because Bob is blessed.  I was gone so long and that burner was not even on medium, but medium high. 

I swear my deceased Dad was blowing on that burner to slow her down.  Someone was!!!  No way to relay this in words. No way. I shall thank Dad or whoever before bedtime...  Not on my knees of course.  Charles (God) knows I cant get back up so good (well) once I am down.  Bless these burned out hips.

Really I think we escaped a fire or at least smoke damage.  I don't think Dad or Charles knows that wouldn't have been so bad if the pets didn't die anyway....  I could have collected enough insurance money to blow this pop stand and start over in Sante Fe where the spirits would love to see me comin!  I can hear them and they need to be heard. 

Sooo, be well, be safe, be happy, and get rich so you don't need fires or smoke damage $ to getcha where you wanna go!

Laters.....

Bob!...............by Diane Ogden

 My daughter called me last Sunday while visiting her Grandmummie at the funny farm where I was raised.  She was all excited and drama-ed out over a female cat someone dropped off out there about two months ago.  "Why cant people just be nice!"  This is obviously a house cat and this is Wisconsin in March not to mention this months two plus snowstorms.  The little girl had a gauge under his eye (she got real lucky on that one) and mites in her ears and a bad UTI. (Urinary Tract Infection)  How do I know this?  Well let me tell you how. 

I strongly suggested and recommended she, my daughter to leave the cat there at the funny farm and we will get some antibiotics from the Vet and Grandmummie dearest can put it in her food.  No more was discussed except that she came home with the cat in a carrier.  Might I also mention her other cat I have been babysitting for the past year and three months went totally ballistic.  Tried to attack my daughter and anyone or any thing near her.  She was pissed and carrying a load of anxiety ready to kill!  She was literally growling.  So new cat went behind daughters closed bedroom door.  I was rather angry to say the least. 

I started calling all around to see who might take her in.  P.S. I thought it was a her because daughter said she was about to have a litter and something long and pink and bloody was starting to come out.  SERIOUSLY!  That is a penis not a female cat birthing..... for God (or Charles) sakes.  And this cat has a bladder infection or is blocked up.  My brain is going Cha Chink Cha Chink Oh shitski! This should not be my problem.  But it was.  The emergency animal clinic quoted me $1,500 - $2,000 for surgery if a urinary blockage.  So I told the cat it couldn't die overnight.  Not on my watch please.   (Bob is not feeling so good in photo)

I called my vet early in the morning, stuck the cat into the carrier and off I went I think in hopes of free help for him all the while knowing that was not going to happen.  WHY ME?  Then I thought, oh stop it, it isn't cancer or shit like that.  So I shut up and drove onto the vets.  Wait, I thought of something else while driving there.  He has no name.  He has a penis.  Names came to me like Steve, (Steven Tyler) Fred, Sam, (Sam Champion GMA), and so on.  Then out of the universe sailed the word BOB!  My good friends Jim and Jackie Sullivan of Marco Island, Florida named their cat Bob Sullivan. So I said,  "Bob, Bob Ogden it is."  And then I started to laugh.  Its so perfect it funny. 

We arrive at the Veterinarian and they asked me if the cat had a name.  I perked right up proudly and said, "Yup, it's Bob, Bob Ogden."  And two of them started to laugh.  I don't know why but Bob makes people laugh.  They took him away and I went off to work trying not to think about the estimate I was just handed.

 During the day I rec'd two or three phone calls from the Vet Office about Bob.  The good news, no crystals, no surgery, no blockage but a roaring UTI infection and an injured area around the eye.  Each phone call I was told how much they love Bob. Everyone that meets Bob loves Bob.   I asked them to check Bob's ears and they forgot so today Bob and I trekked back to find out he also has mites.  AND so far the total is $350.00. Would you believe, yes you would. The TINY squeezie of eye ointment was $50 and the small amount of powder to be mixed with free water was $50.

Oh, and BOB HAS BALLS.  Yup.  Balls that have to come off.  And his poo needs to be checked for bugs.  ($28.00 hell of a deal because she loves Bob)  Not for the ball removal, no no, for the poo check.  And no charge today for the office call for mites cause they love Bob and because they forgot to do it the other day. 

Bob lets me give him his meds and never fusses. Bob lets me put ointment in his eye and never fusses.  Bob gets right in his carrier and never fusses.  That's my Bob!  When we walked into the clinic his Vet walked right over, squatted down, and said, "There's my cutsie petutsie!  I think Bob is blessed. 

Maybe Bob and I will go on the road.  Doing what?  I don't know, Bob makes people laugh and so do I....   We'll just set up on a corner and put a cup out there like the blind guy.  I 'll put an outfit on Bob.  Maybe I will sing a few tunes, tell a few stories.  Ya like really?  Not!  Hey Bob is blessed.  It'd work.

So I did a good deed...  Wonder what "cat KARMA" gives back.  I bet its good, cause hey, this is Bob we're talking about. 

Hey Be Safe, Be Well, Be Happy, and Be Blessed like me!  And for Charles sakes, get rich so you can also pay for heartworm check, vaccines, dental work and a range of other things Bob might need but can live without until.........  we put that cup out there.  LOL  Laters