"AGORAPHOBIA"....(fear of Brocollli not)

I dedicate this vision to my Granddaughter (not biological but with me since she was 18 months old).
        I used to have Agoraphobia.  Oh yes, that horrible fear based dis-ease that keeps one from life, love, and the pursuit of anything.
        I learned I can hear from the spirit.  The good spirit.  And I did hear one day on October 20, 1999.  I also play with simple numerology which means that day  I heard and had this vision was...October 20, 1999 which adds up to the number 4.  The number 4 represents the teacher and the teacher likes Security. Yup that would be me and my not biological Granddaughter who really is.  We both like security and I rec'd this message from God on the perfect 4 day.  I am giving it to her 18 years later.  Here goes baby girl:

God took me on a FEARLESS Journey.  All the places you will read about I desperately feared.
I quote the words I heard from God. (The Spirit)

"I want you to cast out guilt this day.  I will back you.  I want you to cast out the demon of self defeat which is no more than listening to others too much. And fear of success. It is a part of self defeat. Call in success along with money.  SUCCESS. "
         I suddenly see a JET coming over us.  Me and God.  God tells me to go for a ride.  He says, "Grab a hold of the wing."  I do it. Then I become frightened and God says to let go and he will catch me. So I do and he catches me.  Suddenly, we are on a cloud.  I tell him that was cool God...it was fun.  
        Then he takes me in his one arm and we soar down to an ocean liner.  He sets me on board.  I don't care for it. I have a huge fear of water. He tells me to just stand there for a while and he will be right back.  I don't care for it yet.  Then some people come by and we talk and laugh and I forget I am frightened.  The people invite me to a show on the boat.  I am afraid to leave the place where he left me as he was coming back. But I go anyway. I have so much fun at the fancy show.  And the food was so great.  The people leave and I go back to the place I was standing where he left me.  Many people pass and talk to me.  The islands are beautiful.  The breeze is cool and I can breath so well.  Then I see God.....he came back for me.  He took me back up and we sat on the cloud together.  Silently.  He wanted me to reflect on the day.  It is now getting dark. No one is around as we look down upon the earth. He tells me to stay there he will return in a while.  I don't care for that. I do not like to be out in the middle of no where alone.  (agoraphobia) I hear him say, "You are not alone. I am here." I say but I cant see  you Lord.
       He tells me, "But I have taken care of you all day have I not? And you had a wonderful day, did you not."  I say Okay. Then I sit in silence. No praying. No begging, no fear. Some discomfort, but I have total peace. I see a bright light from a beautiful star.  The star is like alive.  Like lighting the sky just for me. That star gave off a gentle light and with it came love and peace.  Like the star loved me.  So I wasn't alone.  I had a star that loved me.
       Later God returns. He hugs me and tells me to put my  head down and rest.  I fall asleep and he holds me until I awake.  I had no need to eat.  I was just there  in love and peace.  He told me we had a few more things to do before I could go back.  Suddenly I was in my car and he ws sitting next to me in the passenger side.   We were on the Interstate.  One of my biggest fears. Way out in no where land.  Not even a big Green Hiway sign or another car in sight. Scary to me.  But I am fine.  He was next to me.  We had some nice music on and he comments to me that he is a lover of music.  Good music.  Not necessarily always  Godly music but of course that also. He loves the praise of the Godly music. But the ability of his people to master the instruments and make such beautiful sounds from them.  We then visit and look at the beautiful earth that is passing by rather quickly as the speed limit is up there around 70ish, although I seems to be more like suspended in time somewhere speed.  I saw no rest stops ahead.  I saw no hospital signs that I usually look for when I would get frightened.  I didn't seem to need them.  I saw the most beautiful precious deer on the side of the road.  Then God tells me he has to leave, but he will be back in a while.  I do not want him to leave.  He reassures me I will be fine, that he is not far away.  I tell him I do not like to be alone out there.He assures me once again, I will be fine, he is not far away. Then he is gone.  I continue to drive and watch the road and signs and animals and now there are many cars around me.  Even a policeman passes me by.  I wonder if I have a flat tire what will I do? Then I forget that fear/thought. I wonder what I will do if I will get sick and am alone, then I forget that fear also.  I wonder if anyone knows where I am, then I forget that also.  I wonder if I choke and no one will be around to help me.  Then I see the beautiful trees and forget all that. I wonder if a car will hit me and I will die.  Then I suddenly hear the beautiful music he was speaking of and I forget the fears.  I wonder where I am going.....then I realize where.  I am going to a new place.  A place with no fear/broccoli.   (joke)  A place where I do not think of fear.  But of music and peace and animals and sky with clouds I can make into pictures and green grass and signs that say there is more life to see with each mile.
      .....suddenly he is back.  He is siting next to me and all is well after all.  As quickly as we got onto that Interstate Highway I was so afraid of ....we were back on the cloud.  He says, "How was that?" I tell him what happened ( as if he didn't know) and he replies, "I know."  I say, what's next Father.   He says....."Let's go fishing."  I say, I don't like little boats and the water.  I am not comfortable. He says...."We'll see."  Suddenly we are in a boat.  Not a very big one either. I am not comfortable. The water is moving and I am thinking I will get dizzy.  He calmly says...."Why don't you concentrate on your fishing line, and the beauty that surrounds you."  BLINK....I have a fish on my line. Wow, a pretty big one. I never caught anything but little bitty stinky ones before.  This was FUN.  I never noticed the water moving.  I was not dizzy...I was busy.  Then I caught another and another and I got to keep them.  God and I had fish together on the shore that night. I wasn't even cold.  And I forgot to be afraid.  God showed me the other side of fear. It was called FUN. He told me, "YOU DESERVE IT, YOU CAN HAVE IT. IT IS YOURS." I accepted that from him  Then he said we had one more thing to do.  We went to a place....a weird place.  Many people walking all over  and around us. As the people came up to us, God would ask me to tell him about them.  Individually.  I did.  I discerned them.  I discerned the spirits around them.  He quizzed me. I would tell him my first impression of each person.  Then I would name the spirits that inhabited them.  And if needed I would dust off my feet.  I would move on or speak more to the chosen ones.  I knew their feelings.  I knew their spirits. Their hearts. Their souls.  I knew. He had given me some gifts to use to help others.  He watched and listened and had a proud heart of me. He touched me with his love and gifts that I would touch others. He believed in me and bestowed that belief in me for others. HE never left me. I wasn't afraid anymore. I realized he was never far from me as he had shown me that over and over.  He had promised to come back to me each time and he did.  I really was never alone.  I am not abandoned.  I wont ever be.  I am not afraid as there are too many good things to see.  I am healed by the one who knows all.  By the teacher of all teachers.  He is my Heavenly Father who sits on a cloud within me and waits for me to sit with him.  And when I do he shows me whatever I need to see.  He shields me from what I do not need to see and shows me what I need to know and see.  With God on my cloud and my Angel, the gentle star lighting my way....there is no room for fear.  It is dead as the nerve in a dead body.  I am alive.  I am Diane....Alive and of God.

It was not an instant healing from AGORAPHOBIA but it was the death of it in my mind.... Anyone can take this journey....

Samsung 6

I have had my Samsung 6 phone for two years now.  Made the last payment today.  Have gone thru two lifetime warrantied plastic glass covers, and three safety covers.  I made the last payment today.
I had stopped into the corporate offices to have the latest ZAGG lifetime guaranteed glass cover put on for me.  Did I mention I made the last payment today.  While I was there I purchased  a new safety cover.  I was sitting with the Geek kid on one side of his cubby when I took my old cover off and laid it next to the new cover.  I looked at him and back at the two covers laying side by side on the desk..... I said in embarrassment:  "I tried to clean it.  I put it in the washing machine, the dishwasher, and soaked it in bleach.  It looks like a Nursing Home!  You know, all yellow and brown and rotted....like it should have been discarded or dead long long ago. " Yes he laughed.  I said, "Dang thing has liver disease."  I feel I should go wash my hands again so I don't get it dirty. (I had just used the rest room and washed my hands)  He mentioned I could have purchased the black one.  I said, "No, girls don't like black."  He said, "Oh yes they do!"   And I said nothing because I felt a twinge of he meant something else.  He was trying to make a funny.  Maybe I should have bought the black one..  As I have gotten older, to say the least, I have learned what shows dirt and what doesn't.  Even emotional dirt...  And once again I failed at the test.

And this is the other cover my boyfriend (he is over 60 so what do I call him?) bought me at $80.00.
First time I dropped it.....broke.  I loved that cover.

The dirty one I replaced was $20 and it has saved me a ton of $$$.  So I have evolved and learned. I just need to replace it more often.  Eewww.  Did I mention I made my last payment today.

A True Story: The Tablecloth......by Rigg Kennedy from FB

> THE TABLECLOTH
>
> The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry,
> to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited
> about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run
> down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time
> to have their first service on Christmas Eve.
>
> They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc., and on
> December 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On December
19
> a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two
> days.
>
> On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he
saw
> that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by
> 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit,
> beginning about head high.
>
> The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to
> do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he
> noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for
> charity so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade,
ivory
> colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross
> embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up
the
> hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
>
> By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the
> opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor
> invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.
>
>
> She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a
ladder,
> hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor
> could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire
> problem area.
>
> Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like
> a sheet.. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?"
>
> The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner
> to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These
> were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years
> before, in Austria.
>
> The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just
gotten
> the Tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her
husband
> were well-to-do people in Austria. When the Nazis came, she was forced to
> leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was
> captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
>
> The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep
> it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home, that was the
> least he could do.. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was
> only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
>
> What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost
> full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the
> pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they
> would return.
>
> One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued
> to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't
> leaving.
>
> The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it
> was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in
> Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much
> alike.
>
> He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for
> her safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put
> in a prison.. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in
> between.
>
> The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride.
> They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had
> taken the woman three days earlier.
>
> He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's
> apartment knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he
> could ever imagine.
>
> True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid
>
> Who says God does not work in mysterious ways..
>
> I asked the Lord to bless you as I prayed for you today. To guide you and
> protect you as you go along your way. His love is always with you, His
> promises are true, and when we give Him all our cares you know He will see
> us through. So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best..
> Just remember I'm here praying and God will do the rest.
>
>
> Pass this on to those you want God to bless, and don't forget to send it
> back to the one who asked God to bless you first
>
>

The Ghost on Terrace Avenue

Today was like any other ordinary day not that I didn't wish for it to be more or even less depending on the subject matter.  I worked until mid afternoon, stopped at the second hand store only to find nothing, then the bank to deposit less then the usual weeks wage.  Thought about stopping for some groceries but turned that idea to the wind and went home.  As I pulled into the underground parking I wondered when the next time I would leave it would be.  I do like order and I like to know what's next but today I didn't have that privilege as tomorrow was a no work day with no plans. I unloaded the car, pulled the little Grannie cart full of to do's to the elevator and then first floor.  Unlocked the door to 101 to greet the oncoming rush of my three roommates. Gracie Allen, 7 lb. non yippee Chihuahua Pekingese mix, Bob the 11 pound rescue tiger cat, and Lucy Lou the beautiful "Snowshoe" rescue from the family funny farm.  Yes they all come to greet me!  Sometimes its annoying but mostly its swell.  Next I take Gracie out to podie.....  Today in Wisconsin we had sunshine.  Write that down because it is as rare around here lately as it is to hear TRump tell the truth.

Back to my point which I haven't even made yet but was headed for.  Gracie and I head out due East. ( A little drama)   We walked two blocks when I decided to turn back.  I could see someone walking toward us in the far distance but it wasn't a very clear image.  I recall thinking I might need new glasses because danged if I could get a clear vision of the person.  It was obvious this person was not walking normally.  I had an eerie feeling especially considering we were on a face to face collision course.  The closer we got the more eerie it got.  I considered crossing the street then unconsidered it as each step made that option impossible. It was too late.  Dear God what was that "thing" coming toward me?  I decided to pick Grace up ten paces before it struck us.  Did I think it would strike us?  No, but I sure knew something was not right.   I could not tell if "it" was a he or a she.   The closer "it" got caused me to shudder a hundred times under my skin. Ghost bumps as big as golf balls on every part of my being.  Swirls of fear and the anticipation of possible death surrounded me.  Drama?  Oh yes and no...."It" was real. "It" had long hair.  A hoodie over the hair and light gray eyes with dark dark circles surrounding them.  Really dark circles. A drawn sunken gray face to match the eyes.

  This person or thing walked not with a limp but with each step it placed all its body weight on first the left, then the right making it appear as though the legs were stiff or the hips didn't give even a centimeter.  The right hand held a small bag of just purchased something....and the left hand was hanging very low with its fist clenched. It come closer and closer until finally at my front left side.  I said, "Good afternoon."  "It" said NOTHING.  A cold forward stare sent more golf ball chills thru me like the cold icy winter wind of a blizzard.  There was no way I could continue walking in the opposite direction of "it."  I whirled around facing "it"  as I walked backwards holding Gracie.  "It" person never missed a beat...just walked like a robot down the sidewalk.  I remember thinking what if "it" turns around like I did and see's me walking backwards stalking "it."  Well I wasn't stalking, but I was unsure for sure. I considered following "it" to make sure "it" had a home "it" was going to.  Or to make sure "it" was real and not a ghost or dear God an Angel in disguise because I would have failed that test for real today.

I enjoy the paranormal but I am also cautious of "it".  Today was cautious day. The person I encountered was not friendly nor was it normal in appearance in any way. "It" was the most evil thing I have seen in person in a long long time if ever.  But in thinking on it rationally I wonder if "it" wasn't merely an old woman with no vehicle going to the PDQ for bread.  Nawh, it was an old man that went to the liquor store for a bottle of Wodka!  Or was "it" the ghost of Terrace Avenue and I am one of the few selected humans who have gotten to see it show itself.  Only the strong evil ones can manifest themselves after passing.  Regardless,  "It" thang scared the beegeebeeze outta me today.  Not that I would have changed a thing though.  I am thankful to be alive and cautious. I always say, "There are two being buried at the Regent Street Cemetery and one being dug for."  I'm good.
P.S.  This is a true story.

The Million Dollar Chandelier........................by Diane Ogden

This Chandelier really isn't a million dollars.  But it might as well be because it is $1,000.00.  I was looking through Craig's List today and happened upon this beautiful chandelier listed at $1,000.00. And it noted the crystals are Swarovski.  Really?  Well I guess I have had a Swarovski thousand dollar Chandelier hanging in my bedroom all these years.  And I got mine at the resale shop for $75.00.

I called this post The Million Dollar Chandelier because that is one of my favorite phrases....  Whether at the drive up banking teller or at J.C. Penney.  Whenever I am asked if there is anything else they can do for me I inevitably say, "Yes, a MILLION DOLLARS please."  It always brings a smile to the teller or clerk.  

So either I have an authentic Swarovski  Crystal Chandelier glistening and dancing above my head like a million in my bedroom, or the person on Craig's list is going to take someone for a fancy ride on a crystal chandeliers "tale." 

Either way, I love mine. 

Maniac's or Maybe Just Kids................by Diane Ogden

I was a thinking about having a very quiet relaxing weekend after cleaning FOURTEEN houses last week....  not to mention baking a few dozen cookies for my old bestie who had two brain aneurysms removed.  Shesshh I cant even spell those bloody things and that is just fine with me. I want no closeness to them whatsoever...  anyways...  I rec'd a text, no one calls anymore, especially if they are asking for favors.  It was my one and only daughter.  She told me my Granddaughter was begging to see me.  That merely meant my daughter was in dyer need of some respite.  Then I heard the typed words (yes you can hear typed words) reverberate in my head.... "Oh, Carson wants to come too!"  Okay, here's the deal.  Carson is my daughter's boyfriends son.  He is almost 5, so he is a 4. Said boyfriend has custody of that boy whose Mom left him and went off to California with her new boyfriend and her pregnant new child. I do not mean to be flippant.  It is serious for that young boy and ME if I am going to be a partaker of the situation.  Bottom line...I say YES!  No I type YES!  Really I am thrilled to have the kids yet a bit apprehensive.  To the point of calling one of my clients and asking what the heck I do with two 5 year olds.  You know, one almost 5 and one 5.  She gave me some ideas....not to mention it is freezing outside and I have donned myself in brown tights, brown boots with no lining, a pale peach light sweater (OMG, got it at Hells Gate, Wal Mart)meaning it is frail from China.  All this is saying, we are not going any of those outdoor activities she suggested.  I thanked her profusely and moved on.   It also entered my head that I had no kid food at my old grandma apartment.  Gawd, no mac n cheese, no candy, no caffeine poop, no pop...sorry.  No ice cream, no chips, no nadda nothin'.  Okay deal Nana D.  And so I did as I always do in this life.

I met them at a designated place.  They were so excited and so was I.  Was that dumb? Probably.  But we did have a blast.  We laughed the whole time except when they decide to "spank" Gma while she was preparing pancakes the morn after the day before. I say morn for a reason, see?  They hit my rear end with a force I had forgotten existed.  I tried to make a joke of it like I always do with all in life I don't like dealing with.  It didn't work. So I used the REAL VOICE.  Scared the bageebeez outta them. Little brats...

I did take them to the Christmas Light Show near Olin Park.  Carson, who has an issue with his bladder due to the issue with his mother abandoning him to California, had to pee.  There we were at a large park with  dog (Gracie) in the front seat, and two lil people in back seat,

one of which had to pee.  Shitski, so did I but as far as I could see we were screwed.  Then like a flash there they were....TWO BIG BLUE BUCKIES!

I squeezed through the orange barrels and parked.  Success I thought....nope.  LOCKED.  We walked over to the little booths where people volunteer to give out candy canes and doggie biscuits to the site seers.  No one told them the Buckies were locked...  some phone calls made and whalla I am standing behind a little boy who thank GOD and all his ANGELS made it.  I gotta say it was sooo cold in that Bucky I thought he would freeze it.  I also have to say how clean it was.  Heck I would have sat on that one without hesitation.  Probably because we were the first ones to use it all day. And then we drove away to the Grocery store for kid food.

What was I thinking?  They each grabbed a "customer in training" tiny cart and took off.  Need I say more.  I will say we did cause a lot of laughter as we "carted" thru Metcalfs West Town Mall.  We got Milk, organic mac n cheese, cheese, Orange juice, Ice Cream, and GUM.  I forgot what else.  We or I survived.

We arrived home.

 They threw things at each other in my little apt.  I took them to a Christmas Cookie gathering of the tenants I have never met as I have recently moved in here.   I was scared to flippin life they would mess up.  We went upstairs.....they were good.

  

Then they went into the bedroom with permission from another Gma and they proceeded to KILL IT!  We left with two choc chip cookies wrapped in poinsettia napkins never to return.

Actually it was a fun two days.  I miss them already.  Sort of.

My New Christmas Mittens....................by Diane Ogden

Sounds like the title of a Children's book or like I just got a new kitten named Mittens! No, I really did get a new pair of mittens.  And I got them off a Christmas Tree where I get my  nails done.....albeit, "My new Christmas Mittens. "

They are amazing....

$25.00..... very well made.  White fleece lined.  Sooo warm.

I will keep them in my vehicle at all times with my winter safety kit.  I better work on that kit considering I hear 2" are due by morning.  A little or a lot of snow would be nice for the season.  Then no more....
Feel free to email this wonderful lady for a pair of her Christmas Mittens...  that are nothing to do with cats or children's books.
When I wear them I feel like I am wearing one of those expensive hand knit sweaters from Norway.
No really!